Find A Grave - Membership Concerns

Two True Stories: Joe was a member of findagrave for over 7 years. He researched all of his family members, made sure that he linked members correctly, only worked with memorials that he knew were ancestors, took all the photos himself after asking other family members what they thought and was very careful following all of the guidelines when he wrote Bios. His mistake he joined one of the online forums only to discover that the major purpose of the discussion was verbal abuse of other members. He complained about a specific member and the next day he discovered without warning that all of his work had been deleted. No warning just gone. He was lucky that all along he had backed up his work and he is able to join another reputable grave registration site and just enter the information that was once on findagrave. He also is pleased that at least none of his memorials were readded to the site under another person's name. He was hurt but it probably was for the best. Becky had been a member for only a few years. She was researching her family that had arrived from Ireland. The stories are similar, she only researched family members etc... After several problems, and then reviewing the complaints on this and several other sites Becky contacted management and asked that her memorials and account be deleted. She asked that her work not be transfered to another account. Becky's account was deleted so that now she cannot edit her work transfer her memorials etc... Her account was deleted but not the memorials that still used her user name as the creator. She cannot get her name off of the memorials and cannot get the memorials deleted. All of her memorials were assigned to other members. These two people were members of my family. Be careful with findagrave.
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6 comments
Anonymous
#1691696

Well for starters, if you are only adding our family, you miss the whole reason of the site. What good does YOUR family information do other?

Then most who do this are gimme grabbers thinking they should be given work done by others.

Yet you have nothing to give in return. Just join ancestry and put your family tree there.

Anonymous
#820303

Rule number one for findagrave is don't get on the bad side of an admin or one of their buddies. Admins do what they want and Ancestry's takeover has done nothing to change it.

Admins were busted for backdating their buddies memorials so they would have the older memorial.

After the bust, they changed the FAQs to admin makes the final call on who gets to keep the memorial. Same for removing memorials if a family member requests it.

Anonymous
#711224

Thank the Good Lord I just managed to have friends delete every memorial that I ever added to this site including the ones I had sponsored.(hundreds) I personally also deleted every flower memorial I added (thousands) My family totally agreed with this decision. I had quit the site and transfered all my memorials to friends.

I quit because of a rude, hurtful member. Before leaving I carefully read over the FAQ's. When you read all of the information about this site it sounds so Wonderful and that is what I thought I was a member of. They make you feel that you are needed and welcome and that your privacy will be valued.

It is such a joy to know that not one of the memorials that I created will be used to make money for this company. I really feel sorry for Jim. The Bullies are going to ruin his dream. Its really sad.

Ill leave all of you to make up your minds about this site. My experience hopefully wont be yours.

Bye Findagrave. Whew....

Anonymous
#728024
@PissedConsumer711224

You discussed this with your family first? You ***.

It's a little hobby website that most people in the world don't even visit once.

You should be ashamed of yourself for thinking any of this matters. How small is your life?

Anonymous
#708695

That's right once you create a memorial even if you transfer it you are the only one who can delete it. So if she cant access her account she cannot delete the memorial.

If it was transfered nobody except an admin can delete it because a blocked user was the creator...

When you add stuff to this site they own it. If you remember that you wont get hurt.

Anonymous
#709512
@PissedConsumer708695

I am only new to findagrave. Im not sure what I think so far I havent had enough experience but I came here for some answers.

I do know I saw lots of neat graves. What do you do if someone wont transfer your family graves to you? It seems if these complaints on this site are true that I might not want my family on there but will make up my mind. I also dont like it how when you google my father's name a photo of his grave pops up.

I just dont think thats right.I dont want a fuss and I know I didnt create the work but some of the things in the bio I just dont really want posted. (Like all of the siblings) because some of these people are still alive. If I cant get a transfer I cant change all that. The person wont do it.

They told me they were not related but said they had put alot into it.

What to do? I left a message for two of the contact people but no reply.

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ID
#443802 Review #443802 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Product
Find A Grave Account

Find A Grave - Emails and User Names

Please be careful of your email address. Someone has used my email account and my findagrave user name to create all kinds or requests etc... that I didnt even know about. I dont know what the solution is to all of this because people have no idea of who they are really talking to. I think the Admins need to manage all of the memorials on the site. Members making all these requests... transfers deletions, bios that are not accurate... wars over who manages the memorial. Just let the professionals manage the memorials and edit the submitted information and bios and if you want to delete something, add something, or transfer then you have the professional person who you know you are talking to complete the requested task.
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3 comments
Anonymous
#820305

Professionals? The admins are volunteers, supposedly unpaid. Worse, many are bullies and you cross them or their friends at your own risk.

Anonymous
#709509

I think only family members should be allowed to manage memorials. Im not sure how you can prove that you are a family member.

Ive had some of my Bios edited. Things taken out and things added. Nothing mean or non flattering was in these memorials. But some of the things like "cause of death" were added that I didnt think was appropriate.

I dont want someone to think I wrote that These were accounts I managed myself. If you are not the manager can someone change the bio? I know others can add pictures.

I went in and deleted the additions to my bios. Check all of yours.

Anonymous
#708980

my husban and I worked on the famly tree for years. we usd the same accont because it was easer to keep up with our graves.

We divorced and he wanted to hurt me. he new i loved ***. he contact people who mage our family and had them removed.

most people did not do it i was glad bc he was not really me. dont share email or *** stuff even with yur husban.

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ID
#443789 Review #443789 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Product
Find A Grave Account
new issue -If you plan on using this site be prepared you will for the most part be surrounded by wonderful people but eventually the ones WHO may be troubled come at you out of know where and you have no idea what just happened because those people are random...
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16 comments
Anonymous
#1929453

The ones you will find on the site that are crazy: people who manage 100,000 memorials or more. These people have some sick obsession, and will be the first ones to harass, threaten, and be nasty to you to get what they want. They have mental problems.

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ID
#340105 Review #340105 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Product
Find A Grave Account
Denise, In response to your post. I can't speak for the problems you are having with everyone else. I can only speak for myself. I'm not going to waste my time trying to defend myself because I haven't done anything wrong. I'm just going to point out the facts. You...
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15 comments
Anonymous
#572556

Debbie do your homework! The risk of being harassed and bullied is high!By volunteers and administrators.

People were aggressively stalked and bullied over a period of 4-5 months. Police reports were filed in so many states it was difficult to keep track of. Jim Tipton does nothing to stop the harassment of his volunteer administrators and contributors. what you get is no response, banned or blocked.

Admins delete work in violation of the so called rules.If it takes 33 hours to document and photograph one small cemetery you risk losing it all with disturbed individuals who create false stories to get your account deleted. Try BILLION GRAVES

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ID
#335879 Review #335879 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Tustin, California
Product
Find A Grave Account
Update by user Jul 11, 2012

THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Update by user Jul 11, 2012

And to clarify it has never been about the numbers for me. The way I see it is there are 30 thousand possible connections with 27 thousand plus added bonus photos to those who searching. I have been bitten, stung, hot, cold, hungry,...

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73 comments
Anonymous
#654085

The best way to go somewhere is to ask someone who has been there before, get a Mentor!!. Someone has done what you are trying to do

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ID
#330922 Review #330922 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Washington, District Of Columbia
Product
Find A Grave Account
My story is outlined in my blog at http://en.wordpress.com/tag/jim-tipton/ I have just reported the site to the FBI (Intellectual Property Theft Division), the US Copyright Office, The Los Angeles and New York Times, and intend on reopening my case with the Better...
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85 comments
Anonymous
#1137995

Hate this find a grave page! It's invasion of privacy and makes up ***.

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ID
#225162 Review #225162 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Los Angeles, California
Product
Find A Grave Account

Find a grave should be called find a gossip

My name is Cindy McPhee, I last wrote here because I was really upset about find a grave unprofessionalism they never would explain why they turned off my account and picked on my Little sister (just because she was related to me) I at first felt taken advantage of because I had cared about the nice people and the angel's that I had flowererd and then I finally called the BBB, and when I got angry they answered me, when I was nice and friendly they ignored me, they changed my memorials to their own words and let me look like the creator still even though they took ownership of my memorials, not my grandma but the other memorial's i wrote they were murder victims, they erased that they were killed, when everyone else there has murdered victims memorials made they bullied me and let so many of the other members gossip and write horrible public board lies about me and my deceased husband "Let the dead rest, rude people at find a grave" I filed my complaint about how I was treated very poorly, and I was told they are being investigated from alot of not just the BBB but other agencies as well, if they were more professional and fair they would be ok, but since they act so rude to people who cared about their site, they show their true colors AJ, Jim tipton, Darlene this girl that thinks she owns the site, and people who are there just for flower counts and running people around like they're in high school still being bully's. I call this place Find A Gossip, They left a very sick slanderous lie gossip story about my dead husband and me for atleast 3 days over a month and I had asked nicely 4x to please erase this note since they deleted my husbands memorial, and a fake memorial took his place, they didn't care about my dead husband. I just found out it is barely off it took that long had I written it I would have been in trouble but when their people write rude lies and slanderous comments seriously defamation of character they let it stay they just now erased it because I think this is no longer a joke it's gotten serious, my sister has an account she is afraid to even get on and leave a flower for our dad and grandma, because they said they are watching her and she doesn't do anything, so threats to her go unwarranted my also my 18 yr. old has an account for his dog that was shot last christmas, they deleted his account because he was related to me also but, then restored it, he is going to the Marine's in June he did nothing and they deleted him like my sister, I spoke up so yes, they of course deleted me but my sister and son wo, obviously because they are related to me, they both don't want to go on because they don't need the lies and drama of whatever lies will be made up nest, So instead of find a grave, I call it find a gossip, I enjoyed the nice people but when the admin. people are so unfair and controlling and just plain unprofessional and have their favorites, then it becomes something totally different as long as you don't ask any questions why they are treating you or your memorials a mean way then they feel they own you. well, it's sad there, I have gotten emails from across the world that I met there and even all around the usa, about this site. It's ridiculous some people just want to see who can pass out the most flowers or who gets the most flowers so so sad, not there from there heart but like a competition. They do have some good people contributors there and they have been very caring and encouraging to me and my family. As for the people who run *** I have to say it's too bad for the way it is run. Blessings to Angels in Heaven.
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14 comments
Anonymous
#712164

AJ is one of the worst. He uses fake names. He uses private information to bully. Dont believe a word about what your read on their "privacy policy"

He thinks he has everyone fooled. You can tell its him

by his sarcastic little remarks, name calling, and threats to blackmail. Iv filed a police report and blocked the site from my computer. Better to file a police report prior to something happening so that when it does they will know who to deal with. The police let me tell you did not think this was silly at all after I copied their threats and showed it to the officer. They can hide behind fake names but they can be identified.

Anonymous
#543087

I will keep sending my complaint to the BBB along with copies of my credit card charges to get a refund of the memorials I foolishly sponsored.

BEWARE OF FIND A GRAVE!!

BEWARE OF JIM TIPTON & DEB DASH!

Anita
#519891

awwww :sigh Im sorry you were attacked you are not the only one. There are some really great people on the site and using the site for what it is claiming it is.

There are to many of the other kind of people like kermit who get off on putting other people down. The website is not meant for posting memorials to represent the people that you love.The nasty people push you out.

20 years is a long time to be away from the love of your life. My heart goes out to you.

Anonymous
#270228

There are several people on findagrave that are interested in NUMBERS of memorials that they can do up... doesn't matter if they get them right or not...just how many they can do!

I have sent information to this one person and SHE continues to ignore my requests..she doesn't transfer..she doesn't make changes...

so I just let it go... I have reported it to findagrave...if they want to let her continue doing this...it is their right to do it...

Anonymous
#270223

Cindy,

I have never had any trouble getting someone to delete something or edit something... I have had trouble when *** was down...thinking that my stuff had been deleted..but it never was.. just wondered what went wrong?

Anonymous
#270222

Cindy,

I have never had any trouble getting someone to delete something or edit something... I have had trouble when *** was down...thinking that my stuff had been deleted..but it never was.. just wondered what went wrong?

Anonymous
#262829

@Guess- HAHA! My thoughts exactly!

@kermit also proves my belief of the find a grave elitist ***. As for @Find a Hobby's comments, the poster @Bdub slandered her, how? Look up the definition of slander, sweety. And, if anyone is guilty of libel, it is the Goddard woman herself.

A quick google search will bring up her bio page. How dare she create a "virtual cemetery" defaming the names of people who choose to use chalk on a headstone! Guess what, chalking is not illegal. Referring to these individuals as "culprits" is ridiculous and childish.

I've also searched through the forums and I'm assuming "Jackie" is the same woman. She makes harsh and shameful comments. I notice she has her email address removed and comments shut off.. Hmmmm, wonder why???

Hey, find a grave!

You ban people for other childish reasons, yet this woman is still a member. How is this?

Anonymous
#261752

@Kermit, you are wrong, obituaries ARE under copyright. For someone who is complaining about grammer and such, you need to brush up on your spelling. It's spelled COPYRIGHT.

Anonymous
#261252

Mrs. McPhee's letter is incoherent, a garbeld mess, poorly written and obviously a cry for help.

(Mostly from a 9th grade English teacher) If you are a person interested in genealogy find a grave is a valuable tool. Obituaries are not copywrighted nor are they private. When you write one be careful because they will be on the internet forever. If a person has entered information incorrectly then contact that person directly by his or her email on the site.

If you have no success with that then by all means contact the Find A Grave website directly. But I think your objections will have to be stated a little more coherently than in the above letters.

What a mish mash of the worst syntax ever.

:roll

Anonymous
#259961

Considering it's a volunteer run website, like any other if you don't like it you're free to move along to another. I also sure Ms.

Goddard will be more than pleased to see the public slander, libel and humiliation she's been subjected to by your statement. Besides an education, perhaps some social skills and psychological counseling would help both of you.

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ID
#222829 Review #222829 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Carlisle, Arkansas
Product
Find A Grave Account
Loss
$150

Find A Grave Protects Stalkers and Harassments

I signed up with this website 7 years ago... added 2 people I knew, NEVER HAD A PROBLEM BEFORE, thought they had their act together, until one of my own passed on, so I made a memorial for her since her sister decided to have a friend post an obituary in a newspaper cuting out the entire family and claiming to be the only living relative, whats the next thing?, Well here they all come, posting on Find a Grave Website on this memorial made, I even got an email from one of the whacks that are a friend and big trouble maker of the deceased and her sister,I got called mental, every name in the book, chasitized for posting a warning to this friend not to come on here and post that they are not welcomed etc. Well When I seen the display of sarcasmn, ridicule and slander... I wrote to the Administrator telling them to remove ALL of them except the ones that posted long before they did... oh they removed them alright but only left the sister up there when I made it clear to remove her because shes been following me all over, attacking me etc, yeah I reported it to every offical I could but it seems these people have more rights to slander and libel then we do when we are trying to respect their precious rules, *** me! If anyone sets up an account on this site they will be sorry and I do have the proof to back it up, I have had do delete the deceased's account 3 times now restarting a new one, they found it each time,posting and bugging. I dont know why anyone would expect someone to tolerate this type of behavior and not say a word or defend themselves, it seems just about every State has these lil glitches protecting this type of trash, I have no respect for this and its been now nearly 2 months since the deceased passed on which by the way was Dec 25,2010 by method of hanging, yes she committed suicide. Remember all your privacy is not private. This took place in another state from where I am, on top of this the deceased's aunt who is a C.S.W happily gave out the phone number and possibly my where abouts to the sister which she was not suppose to do, because where this is not even my own house nor is the phone in my name and it's really caused allot of friction and problems with the person whom does pay the bills here, I think thats messed up to allow someone to put your living status at risk on top of this ***! So take aim people, we all are being stabbed in the back by liars! And even if putting a complaint on here dont get nothing done, I am within my rights to freedom of speech! MY FIRST AMENDMENT!!!!! I hope its yours as well! God Bless you all! Good luck with the TRUST value, its 0 in my book!
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9 comments
Anonymous
#543090

I was bullied by a member I have copies of all the messages with his attacks and threats, I have sent them to the attorney general, I suggest you do the same...since the administrator that wears the red lamp is the bully's friend she helped him by banning my account and ignoring my complaints. beware of members that have friends that are administrators they will continue to make bogus complaints until they get you banned.

Anonymous
#526921

I cannot believe i was a member of this site before I ran in to the the disturbing behavior, All it took was a 1 time encounter with an admin who bans and abuses FAQS and photo volunteers. I like another person I know have vowed to warn others about the shady side of this site and FG STALKERS COME OUT OF THE WOODWORK DENISE HARDEN CHARLOTTE STOUVALL ALSO KNOWN AS PIXIE DIXIE BUGABOO AND CJ.

they block me on face book and log in under other names to read my posts :eek :upset :eek :upset :x looking up info on my kids. Hey Jim Tipton Good To Know You Protect stalkers but ban chalkers

Anonymous
#284094

I don't think these people know how how to pay attention to anything, skim through these complaints catching what they think suits them them remark on it like children. Your ignorance is showing, wonder how many times you embarrass yourself on a daily basis using the net to reply cause you don't have the integrity to face anyone in person, an article should be written about you and how immature you are, bet that would grab your nerves now wouldn't it.

Oh and Find a Grave is based out of Utah, so writing to the Attorney General of Utah regarding any of this sights so called administrations hassling anyone on these complaint sites should do the trick. The site should be more professional if it wants to build a good reputation of its use instead of sending its Chihuahua's to *** at the ankles of a user - that's pretty pathetic retaliation if you ask me.

Anonymous
#259870

Attacking anyone on any memorial is sinister. Its also illegal to harass and follow someone that is considered stalking.

Whether there is family issues or not, a site that advertises a business should provide standards to respect its users.

I agree the site should provide tools to avoid this type of nonsense, they would catch more bees with sugar.

Free service or not, it still provides a sponsership to make its money; the entire concept is to cover all basis irregardless of what others may seem to think or feel. That's the problem with today's society many dont think out the whole thing and that's what causes problems.

RJ
#259864

@SG:Find a Grave has nothing to do with the info of someone being givin out... When this info was passed on to me, out of shock I myself being in another state put a memorial site up for my daughter which was attacked by others who have no eithics.

The policies of info on C.S.S.

are stated as fact, no person shall release any info of another, second of all by doing this it only caused problems by others. Never the less it was out of line and WRONG.

I am sure Find a Grave may mean well in its efforts to offer a service for those in mourning but when others like what I and perhaps others have had to experiance with no tools to remove or block a unstable poster this is where the problems arise.

Again Some dont use their brains and that's what God gave all a brain for, how you use it or abuse it is on You however there are consequences to be paid when its misused in a fashion not suitible to the other party. And no one should have to experiance that kind of behavior by anyone at any given time!

RJ
#259863

@SG:Find a Grave has nothing to do with the info of someone being givin out... When this info was passed on to me, out of shock I myself being in another state put a memorial site up for my daughter which was attacked by others who have no eithics.

The policies of info on C.S.S.

are stated as fact, no person shall release any info of another, second of all by doing this it only caused problems by others. Never the less it was out of line and WRONG.

I am sure Find a Grave may mean well in its efforts to offer a service for those in mourning but when others like what I and perhaps others have had to experiance with no tools to remove or block a unstable poster this is where the problems arise.

Again Some dont use their brains and that's what God gave all a brain for, how you use it or abuse it is on You however there are consequences to be paid when its misused in a fashion not suitible to the other party. And no one should have to experiance that kind of behavior by anyone at any given time!

RJ
#259859

Happy Graver Wrote:Exactly how were you scammed? You were NOT. You did not have to pay a dime to join or create a memorial.

Duh George, I never said I was scammed on Find a Grave, Get your facts straight as for the Aunt she is the one who foolishly gave out info where I was. Yes the family has this issue but I am not the one who created it, THEY DID And yes it is being dealt with, because for the better judgement was not good judgement.

And Yes the Website Does not monitor its activity and it does not offer any tools to remove posts not necessary, sounds to me like you work for them and dont want to be called on the carpet.

People who post a memorial do it so others who wish to visit in a decent way. Contacting them however can at times never be completed. Never the less I got the logs to back it up.

Anonymous
#249829

How does Findagrave have anything to do with the deceased's Aunt giving out inf on you ? I agree with Happy Graver's comments, the problem is with the family not the website. Hope the family can work things out, life is to short.

Anonymous
#248508

I don't see how Find A Grave is the source of your problems. Seems to me that the problems your having is with the family of the person you posted. NOT the website.

YOU made the choice to create the memorial page. Which can be found with a simple web search. Odds were pretty good that the family would find it. Find A Grave admins are not there to deal with squabbles between family and friends of those it memorializes.

Exactly how were you scammed? You were NOT. You did not have to pay a dime to join or create a memorial.

Your problems are rooted with the family not the website

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ID
#220256 Review #220256 is a subjective opinion of poster.
Location
Dallas, Texas
Product
Find A Grave Account