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Hi, I am BJS #48745848.I have been researching for over 8 years now through ancestors.com, books, and personal interviews of my husband, and my family line.

Related: Find A Grave - Mostly good folks but getting a lot worse

I only have 48 Memorials that I manage and have made 9 Memorials. While I love *** I am still finding people who refuse to transfer ownership to me when they are my direct line. I really need help with Suki Davey #47883436 who has refused me my direct Great-Grandparents about 3 times. I have asked politely and her last comment was for me to understand the hundreds of hours people have spent in research and time.

Also, she told me, a transfer does not have to happen automatically. I would like to manage Alberic Mondville, #128068862, as He is my direct Great- Pepere, and my direct great-Memere Leocadie Levesque dit Lafrance Mondville #128068996. They are not in SUKI DAVEY direct French blood line. She has practically the entire St.

Joseph Cemetery in Biddeford, Maine.

This is not right as I have many, many family members there and they are not hers.Help!

I liked: Helping future generation relatives find pertinent.

I didn't like: Inactive memorial manager, Getting screwed over, Disrespect.

Review #1031420 is a subjective opinion of a user.

Reason of Review / Monetary Loss Other / Not specified
Preferred solution Not specified

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Jack
Boise, Idaho, United States #1325959

I understand your frustration.I have a similar situation with a Find A Grave contributor (***) that only goes by the name “Barb” and her *** ID is: #46936813.

Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, this “Barb character” does not allow public comments on her personal *** page.

Here’s my story. I took care of my mother in my home for the last five years of her life and as you might imagine it was particularly intense and difficult for the 11 months that she was on hospice prior to her death on May 20, 2015. I had been a *** member for about 3 ½ years at the time of my mother’s death and was able to have other *** contributors transfer management of some of my family’s memorials over to me. Within a week after I took care of my mother’s funeral and final affairs I created a memorial for her on Find A Grave and linked other family members to her memorial (#146770767).

However, one of my cousins brought to my attention the fact that there was another memorial for my mother that had been created by this “Barb character” the day after my mother’s death (May 21, 2015) that consisted primarily of her obituary and the pictures that we included in her obituary. I immediately contacted this “Barb” person and informed her of who I was and that I had created a much more detailed memorial for my mother and requested that she delete the one that she had created. This “Barb person” has never replied to my initial an subsequent messages and what’s strange is that she...

Hard to believe, but I now recognize that there are “*** contributors” who are nothing more than psychologically disturbed competitors engaged in a contest of who can create and manage the most memorials on Find A Grave. That’s kinda sick – eh?

I had given up on attempting to get my mother’s memorial transferred over to me until just a few days ago; I suppose because the two-year anniversary of her death is approaching rapidly.

Anyway… I wrote a message regarding this matter to the curators/managers/administrators at Find A Grave this past Friday.I’ll let you, this forum, and my attorney know what transpires regarding this peculiar and highly unethical situation.

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Dedicated Graver
#1315725

Are they your actual great grandparents (not 2nd, 3rd or more)?

Anonymous
to Dedicated Graver #1318023

What do you mean by ACTUAL? What else would they be?

Dedicated Graver
to Anonymous #1318628

Many people requesting a transfer say "great grandparent" when the "actual" relationship is 2nd great grandparent, 3rd great grandparent, 4th great grandparent, etc.

Anonymous
to Dedicated Graver #1318665

If a family requests a transfer of 2nd 3rd 4th 5th 6th 7th 8th 9th 10th grandparents and they are not YOUR family ---- Then transfer all of them to the family who wishes to have them and WHO they belong too. Family members can do a much better job with Biographies as these people are their biological family members!

SadPeople
to Anonymous #1329461

No need to ask for transfers for ancestors to you, because it wont happen very often.Some do it out of honesty BUT.....

some people on this site are far to grumpy, whiny and gripe for even asking for such a thing..... and do mean things for revenge for even asking. Some are not all together upstairs in the noodle department.

Just stay away from the achy, grouchy, old grumps!There are too many neurotic people there who grumble complain constantly.

ItsNotDifficultFolks
Duluth, Georgia, United States #1315699

Simple fix versus whining here about it.

Determine if you REALLY REALLY REALLY NEED to have management of the entries.

If you feel you do, send an email to Support@findagrave dot com with links to the memorials for your great-grandparents.

In this email, request transfers of these great-grandparents to your account based on the four-generation Family First rule.

CLEARLY state your relationship to the deceased.

WAIT - it will not happen overnight but these entries WILL be transferred to you within a few weeks.

This family relationship is a required transfer UNLESS the memorial manager is more closely related.

Then move on and do something to make a difference on the site versus being a gimme-grabber - you've made 9 entries but manage 48?You are a relative collector.

Nutjobs
to ItsNotDifficultFolks #1316497

They are NOT closer related to my grandparents!They are insane BULLIES & GREEDY SICKOS!

Most are not even related ......not even 20 generations back!Orrrr whatever!

Fedup
to Nutjobs #1318018

I'd bank on it that nasty corrupt people there on *** are nasty and corrupt in the same manner outside of ***.Mean people have NO FRIENDS in-or-out of ***-- So these lesser than Jack A's called morons with lower than low mental capacities are NOT very intelligent!--- Mark my word they are not in any way Genealogists?

They are copy cats, thieves and hoarders!These whacks sit around daily on their BIG puter-butts confiscating material from others with nothing else to do in their pitiful lives - what a farce!

ItsNotDifficultFolks
to Nutjobs Duluth, Georgia, United States #1318814

You cannot determine if someone is related "20 generations" back - that's THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of descendants at that point.And when you get past the point of the required 4 generation transfer, you ABSOLUTELY can have multiple Find A Grave members with the same relationship distance from the deceased.

I know of at least 7 Find A Grave members who can all claim they are 3rd great grandchildren of one man (including me). Who gets the memorial when several of them ask for it? HMMMM???????

REGARDLESS, the site is for DOCUMENTING GRAVE SITES - it was NOT created as a family genealogy site and years ago there WAS NO TRANSFERRING ANYWAY. - and when you get all upset over not having management you are trying to make the site something it's not.

Want to have an entry the way you want it? Start your own site. Join Ancestry and create a family tree and add thousands of people just the way you want. GROW UP and GROW A PAIR.

I just love to read the rants that people have when they are actually told NO regarding a transfer. Then the ugly name calling and public posting about how horrible that person is because they won't "give" you control. AND in this case , IF the entries are for your GREAT GRANDPARENTS, it's a REQUIRED transfer and with a LITTLE EFFORT on your part, Find A Grave WILL give you management of the entries!!!!

But no, you have to come over here and God knows where else to COMPLAIN and MOAN and show your HIND END over a...

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